An Original Narrative

I enjoy manipulating numbers and words and today I gave myself a word challenge. I wanted to see if I could right a story, that made some kind of sense, in which I had to do 2 things with the lines of the story. Here is the story. See if you can figure out the 2 things I did, or tried to do. The answers are in the comments section.

Attention is needed if you want to learn a lesson worthy of retention
Being selfish is an attribute that is not worth seeing
Connor is the recipient of a dubious honor
Displaying no gratitude when “thanks” he should be saying
Each time a friend handed him something well within his reach
Frankly, the least his friends wanted was a gesture that was thankly
Greeting him would be different soon after meeting him
“Hello” he would say in a tone that was relaxed and mellow
Immediately afterwards he would lose that tone repeatedly
Jerkiness was displayed as much as Rachael Ray’s perkiness
Keeping his alarm on even as it was beeping
Lounging at your house and for food always scrounging
Money never repaid and acting like it was funny
Now it was time for him to learn a lesson, and oh how
Only how could it be done without making him totally lonely now
Producing a change in him with his jerkiness reducing
Quickly a lesson was developed that would lay it on thickly
Right then they saw an even that was quite the sight when
Soda was poured on Connor when he meanly said “No duh”
To Hank’s nice gesture and Hank pointed out there were no thanks
Unless he got thanks, Hank would make Connor’s life funless
Very quickly Connor saw how the situation was getting hairy
When faced with this dilemma, Connor immediately knew what to do then
X-rays were not wanted and Connor wanted to enjoy his next days
Years later Connor still continues to say “thanks” “gracias” and “cheers”
Zero times since has he been anything less than a hero